Back, But Still in Transition

Back to the mail. Watercolor and ink. 4/20/2015

It's great to travel, and good to come home, but sometimes it's harder than others to pick up the threads of where you were a few weeks ago, or a month ago, and start in again. For some reason, it's not been particularly easy for me to jump back into my life as it was -- the mail, the taxes, the accounting, the book business. I've done what I needed to do, but I feel like my mind is partially elsewhere. Because of J.'s exhibition, we had a lot to do right after getting back from Mexico City, and I haven't had time yet to work on my photos or even think about the trip very much, let alone write about it. It's more than that, though. I was thinking about what I wanted to do next before I ever left, about some changes in my internet use, and in my daily life. Some of those questions have been answered, and some continue to loom unresolved in the back of my head, but more pressingly now because my schedule is finally more open. That's always the case, isn't it? We long for space -- time -- freedom, and then when summer vacation, or retirement, or even that free weekend arrives, we don't find it so easy to act decisively and take advantage of it to do what we thought we wanted to.

Desk with pink gift boxes. Watercolor and ink, 4/27/2015.

I feel a bit like this jumble on my desk, which is probably why I drew it last night. There are some precious things here that I wouldn't part with; some obsolete or broken items that need to be thrown out; evidence of work in progress; and some recent gift boxes: pretty but empty.

When we return from time away, we also notice things we had ignored. I've got a lot of stuff that needs to be cleaned up, straightened out, and actually it feels like I need to do that before starting any new big projects. I'm talking more about real things, practical things like my desk, but there's probably head-stuff as well. And it's almost spring, even here in the far north where it has taken forever to arrive. It's the opposite of the way it should be, but spring is always the hardest time of year for me, when I'm the most likely to feel a bit depressed. So it's time to get outside, continue the exercising that's been helping me get through these interminable end-of-winter days, play the piano, draw, clean the terrace, and not be too hard on myself. You heard it here!

Comments

[Duchesse]

Was just thinking something like that: am I •always• this busy with tasks, straightening, maintaining? Two weeks away, which we had not done in 4 years, brought the same disorientation. Soon, though, we will have our own greening and blooming, which is bound to lift the spirit.

[Martine]

Je suis dans la même situation après nos deux voyages! Je ne sais plus trop par quel projet commencer...

[Marie]

Un beau désordre en tout cas!
Marie

[Robb]

Kia ora Beth,
Sometimes it is just best to put on your boots and go for a walk..Kia kaha e hoa.
Robb